5:30 - 6:00 Wake up before your alarm. Don't go back to sleep, because, why bother at this point?
6:15 Roll out of bed. Yawn.
6:15 - 6:50 Get ready. Then dick around doing who knows what.
6:52 Realize you are going to be late to work. Rush down to the car. Put your lunch on the front seat (instead of in the back where it normally goes)
6:53 Pull out of parking spot. Realize lunch is falling on the ground. Worry about applesauce spilling. Reach over to grab lunch.
6:54 Run into a really, really big concrete thing. Hit your head because you haven't put on your seatbelt yet.
6:55 In shock. Get out of car and assess the damage. Get back in car to move it into a parking spot. Realize it won't go anywhere.
6:56 Cry
7:00 - 9:30 Call boyfriend. Call father. Call insurance company. Be informed you don't have collision. Call tow truck. Call auto shops. Curse yourself for being such an idiot.
9:30 Follow tow truck to auto shop. Boyfriend drives you to work. Realize you forgot that god damn lunch.
10:00 Work. Feel stupid after telling the story 10 times.
2:00 Headache. Really, really bad headache.
4:30 Time to go home. Oh wait... we're working late today.
5:30 Finally leave work. Have to take the bus home. Oh, don't worry, home is only 25 miles away.
6:00 Find bus stop. Get on first bus. Transfer. Transfer.
7:44 Get off bus near home. Boyfriend waiting in the parking lot across the street. Drive home and collapse on couch.
9:00 Only solution in sight: ice cream.
Ugh.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Le Sigh
Not too long ago I made a big decision.
More recently I made another decision. One that reversed the first one.
I left New York for a good reason.
After almost 2 years of togetherness I had serious doubts.
Doubts about the past, about the present
But mostly doubts about the future.
Marriage? Kids? Forever-and-ever?
A lot of these doubts came about because of the stupidest little things.
Like, he didn't tell me EVERY DAY.
Or ever, really.
But the last few months I've learned a lot about forever-and-ever.
Its not about hearing the right things, or saying them.
Its about having someone who really knows you. And loves you.
Like tonight we went out to dinner with a group.
I was running late and told D to order for me.
He took one look at the menu and said "she'll have the chicken"
The rest of the group decided to wait to order til I arrived.
I took one look at the menu and said "I'll have the chicken"
The rest of the group laughed.
(By the way, if you are ever in LA, have dinner at the Lobster. Hello sunset.)
Forever-and-ever is also about being nice.
Too nice. Over the top nice. Gross nice.
Like on Wednesday I mentioned we were out of raisins.
On Thursday D showed up after work with raisins. Costco sized bag.
Then when we went to work out his iPod battery died
So I gave him mine and went without.
4 miles without music? That's love, people.
Le sign...
More recently I made another decision. One that reversed the first one.
I left New York for a good reason.
After almost 2 years of togetherness I had serious doubts.
Doubts about the past, about the present
But mostly doubts about the future.
Marriage? Kids? Forever-and-ever?
A lot of these doubts came about because of the stupidest little things.
Like, he didn't tell me EVERY DAY.
Or ever, really.
But the last few months I've learned a lot about forever-and-ever.
Its not about hearing the right things, or saying them.
Its about having someone who really knows you. And loves you.
Like tonight we went out to dinner with a group.
I was running late and told D to order for me.
He took one look at the menu and said "she'll have the chicken"
The rest of the group decided to wait to order til I arrived.
I took one look at the menu and said "I'll have the chicken"
The rest of the group laughed.
(By the way, if you are ever in LA, have dinner at the Lobster. Hello sunset.)
Forever-and-ever is also about being nice.
Too nice. Over the top nice. Gross nice.
Like on Wednesday I mentioned we were out of raisins.
On Thursday D showed up after work with raisins. Costco sized bag.
Then when we went to work out his iPod battery died
So I gave him mine and went without.
4 miles without music? That's love, people.
Le sign...
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Good Newses!
Numbero Uno:
I have a job!!!!!!!!!
I interviewed last week at a dr's office and was offered a job as a MA. Thank freakin' god. Better news: they are going to pay me a buttload to work there, as in, $4 more an hour than my previous highest pay. HOOORAY!!! If I stay here I should be able to pay off 100% of my student loans in the next 9 to 12 months, which will save me a ton on interest - at least 2 years' worth. I'm so so excited.
Numbero Dos:
My plants are growing! I bought some seeds a few weeks ago and planted them and the first sprouts are coming in. Maybe I can do this garden thing after all. I can't wait for these little babies to start producing yummy herbs. As soon as I remember I'll take a picture as photographic evidence.
Numero Tres:
I bought a bike! I really really wanted a bike, so I scoured craigslist for a few weeks and found a winner at $40. Its a blue beach cruiser that needs a little work. Ok, it needs a LOT of work - new kickstand and a new coat of paint at the very least. But I also want to get a basket for the front, new handlebars (and maybe a new seat) and new tires. Gimme a few weeks... I'm excited!
I have a job!!!!!!!!!
I interviewed last week at a dr's office and was offered a job as a MA. Thank freakin' god. Better news: they are going to pay me a buttload to work there, as in, $4 more an hour than my previous highest pay. HOOORAY!!! If I stay here I should be able to pay off 100% of my student loans in the next 9 to 12 months, which will save me a ton on interest - at least 2 years' worth. I'm so so excited.
Numbero Dos:
My plants are growing! I bought some seeds a few weeks ago and planted them and the first sprouts are coming in. Maybe I can do this garden thing after all. I can't wait for these little babies to start producing yummy herbs. As soon as I remember I'll take a picture as photographic evidence.
Numero Tres:
I bought a bike! I really really wanted a bike, so I scoured craigslist for a few weeks and found a winner at $40. Its a blue beach cruiser that needs a little work. Ok, it needs a LOT of work - new kickstand and a new coat of paint at the very least. But I also want to get a basket for the front, new handlebars (and maybe a new seat) and new tires. Gimme a few weeks... I'm excited!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Bored Bored Bored
Just out of the oven and cooling on the counter: I have to stop baking. I have brownies to finish/resist.
Will be cooking for dinner tonight: Haven't decided yet. Pizza? Chicken and asparagus? We will see.
Currently drinking: Water. Just bought a Brita. Genius.
Playing on the iPod right now: I need a new iPod.
Currently checked out from the library: Getting a library card is on my To Do list.
Currently reading: Little Women
Would like to buy: There's a whole list. New iPod. Bike. Stand mixer. Summer dress. Don't worry, I don't have enough money for any of these things.
Laughing about: UA
Anxiously awaiting: A friggen job.
Needs: A friggen job.
Crazy Future Aspirations: To try and take over the world.
Attempting to Learn: Gardening. Sweet.
Must Resist: Brownies. They are callllllllling me.
What’s Keeping Me Busy: Nothing, absolutely nothing. I'm bored.
Hyped Up About: The beach!
Waiting For: My dad to text me. Yeah, my dad texts.
Craving: Brrrrrrrrrrrrownies.
If I had magical powers: I would get a job.
Looking forward to: Everything!
Will be cooking for dinner tonight: Haven't decided yet. Pizza? Chicken and asparagus? We will see.
Currently drinking: Water. Just bought a Brita. Genius.
Playing on the iPod right now: I need a new iPod.
Currently checked out from the library: Getting a library card is on my To Do list.
Currently reading: Little Women
Would like to buy: There's a whole list. New iPod. Bike. Stand mixer. Summer dress. Don't worry, I don't have enough money for any of these things.
Laughing about: UA
Anxiously awaiting: A friggen job.
Needs: A friggen job.
Crazy Future Aspirations: To try and take over the world.
Attempting to Learn: Gardening. Sweet.
Must Resist: Brownies. They are callllllllling me.
What’s Keeping Me Busy: Nothing, absolutely nothing. I'm bored.
Hyped Up About: The beach!
Waiting For: My dad to text me. Yeah, my dad texts.
Craving: Brrrrrrrrrrrrownies.
If I had magical powers: I would get a job.
Looking forward to: Everything!
Friday, March 20, 2009
Progress
Vermont is jumping on the (tiny) bandwagon.
I am unemployed, which means I have a LOT of time on my hands. I saw this article the article above this morning and started doing some research.
Personally, I'm all for gay rights. I'm of the belief that who another person marries has absolutely zero impact on my life, so let them do what they want. I think of it as choosing a pet. I'm a dog person, and a big dog person at that. I want a Great Dane, aka a small horse. Someone else may like cats. You wouldn't ever ever catch me voluntarily bringing home a cat, not in a million years, but I don't give a crap if someone else does. Same idea. Just substitute people for pets.
One big area of concern for proponents and opponents of gay marriage alike is procreation. There are a lot of questions, the biggest being whether the sexual orientation of the parent has any detrimental effect on the child(ren). This is what I looked at today, and this is what I found:
In this article in the Pittsburgh Post Gazette:
A number of professional medical organizations -- including the American Medical Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Psychiatric Association -- have issued statements claiming that a parent's sexual orientation is irrelevant to his or her ability to raise a child.
For the most part, the organizations are relying on a relatively small but conclusive body of research -- approximately 67 studies -- looking at children of gay parents and compiled by the American Psychological Association. In study after study, children in same-sex parent families turned out the same, for better or for worse, as children in heterosexual families.
Moreover, a 2001 meta-analysis of those studies found that the sexual orientation of a parent is irrelevant to the development of a child's mental health and social development and to the quality of a parent-child relationship.
Abstract of this study done by the University of Virginia:
Does parental sexual orientation affect child development, and if so, how? Studies using convenience samples, studies using samples drawn from known populations, and studies based on samples that are representative of larger populations all converge on similar conclusions. More than two decades of research has failed to reveal important differences in the adjustment or development of children or adolescents reared by same-sex couples compared to those reared by other-sex couples. Results of the research suggest that qualities of family relationships are more tightly linked with child outcomes than is parental sexual orientation.
The American Psychological Association says:
"there is no scientific evidence that parenting effectiveness is related to parental sexual orientation: lesbian and gay parents are as likely as heterosexual parents to provide supportive and healthy environments for their children (Patterson, 2000, 2004; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999);"
"research has shown that the adjustment, development, and psychological well-being of children is unrelated to parental sexual orientation and that the children of lesbian and gay parents are as likely as those of heterosexual parents to flourish (Patterson, 2004; Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001)"
"Many lesbians and gay men are parents. In the 2000 U. S. Census, 33% of female same-sex couple households and 22% of male same-sex couple households reported at least one child under the age of 18 living in the home. Despite the significant presence of at least 163,879 households headed by lesbian or gay parents in U.S. society, three major concerns about lesbian and gay parents are commonly voiced (Falk, 1994; Patterson, Fulcher & Wainright, 2002). These include concerns that lesbians and gay men are mentally ill, that lesbians are less maternal than heterosexual women, and that lesbians' and gay men's relationships with their sexual partners leave little time for their relationships with their children. In general, research has failed to provide a basis for any of these concerns (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). First, homosexuality is not a psychological disorder (Conger, 1975). Although exposure to prejudice and discrimination based on sexual orientation may cause acute distress (Mays & Cochran, 2001; Meyer, 2003), there is no reliable evidence that homosexual orientation per se impairs psychological functioning. Second, beliefs that lesbian and gay adults are not fit parents have no empirical foundation (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002). Lesbian and heterosexual women have not been found to differ markedly in their approaches to child rearing (Patterson, 2000; Tasker, 1999). Members of gay and lesbian couples with children have been found to divide the work involved in childcare evenly, and to be satisfied with their relationships with their partners (Patterson, 2000, 2004a). The results of some studies suggest that lesbian mothers' and gay fathers' parenting skills may be superior to those of matched heterosexual parents. There is no scientific basis for concluding that lesbian mothers or gay fathers are unfit parents on the basis of their sexual orientation (Armesto, 2002; Patterson, 2000; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). On the contrary, results of research suggest that lesbian and gay parents are as likely as heterosexual parents to provide supportive and healthy environments for their children."
and
"Results of social science research have failed to confirm any of these concerns about children of lesbian and gay parents (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999). Research suggests that sexual identities (including gender identity, gender-role behavior, and sexual orientation) develop in much the same ways among children of lesbian mothers as they do among children of heterosexual parents (Patterson, 2004a). Studies of other aspects of personal development (including personality, self-concept, and conduct) similarly reveal few differences between children of lesbian mothers and children of heterosexual parents (Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001; Tasker, 1999). However, few data regarding these concerns are available for children of gay fathers (Patterson, 2004b). Evidence also suggests that children of lesbian and gay parents have normal social relationships with peers and adults (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001; Tasker, 1999; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). The picture that emerges from research is one of general engagement in social life with peers, parents, family members, and friends. Fears about children of lesbian or gay parents being sexually abused by adults, ostracized by peers, or isolated in single-sex lesbian or gay communities have received no scientific support. Overall, results of research suggest that the development, adjustment, and well-being of children with lesbian and gay parents do not differ markedly from that of children with heterosexual parents"
There's a lot of stuff out there that find different conclusions. On the whole, however, those are not scientific articles published in scientific journals based on scientific research. They are opinions, church statements, political statements, journal articles pointing out all the flaws in articles that find no problem with gay parenting, etc etc etc. I'm gonna go with the scientific stuff. Do you know you can find seemingly-authoritative stuff on the web that argues smoking doesn't cause cancer? I'm not trying to argue the nuances of the word "cause" here, like many of these articles. Fact is, smoking puts you at a increasingly higher risk for developing cancer. (Random side note: one article I found argues that a 'paranormal wave' causes cancer. Not anything else. Like smoking or the sun or asbestos. Good one, crazy man, why dont you pass that along to my grandparents?) The point that I'm making is that there's a lot of crap out there regarding smoking and cancer, and that I'm going to rely on the data and opinions of the many research hospitals and universities, medical professionals, and medical organizations like WHO and CDC. Not crazy meta physicists and people paid by the tobacco industry. Same idea with this homosexual parenting stuff - I feel pretty confident in the official positions American Psychological Association and American Medical Association. The end :)
I am unemployed, which means I have a LOT of time on my hands. I saw this article the article above this morning and started doing some research.
Personally, I'm all for gay rights. I'm of the belief that who another person marries has absolutely zero impact on my life, so let them do what they want. I think of it as choosing a pet. I'm a dog person, and a big dog person at that. I want a Great Dane, aka a small horse. Someone else may like cats. You wouldn't ever ever catch me voluntarily bringing home a cat, not in a million years, but I don't give a crap if someone else does. Same idea. Just substitute people for pets.
One big area of concern for proponents and opponents of gay marriage alike is procreation. There are a lot of questions, the biggest being whether the sexual orientation of the parent has any detrimental effect on the child(ren). This is what I looked at today, and this is what I found:
In this article in the Pittsburgh Post Gazette:
A number of professional medical organizations -- including the American Medical Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Psychiatric Association -- have issued statements claiming that a parent's sexual orientation is irrelevant to his or her ability to raise a child.
For the most part, the organizations are relying on a relatively small but conclusive body of research -- approximately 67 studies -- looking at children of gay parents and compiled by the American Psychological Association. In study after study, children in same-sex parent families turned out the same, for better or for worse, as children in heterosexual families.
Moreover, a 2001 meta-analysis of those studies found that the sexual orientation of a parent is irrelevant to the development of a child's mental health and social development and to the quality of a parent-child relationship.
Abstract of this study done by the University of Virginia:
Does parental sexual orientation affect child development, and if so, how? Studies using convenience samples, studies using samples drawn from known populations, and studies based on samples that are representative of larger populations all converge on similar conclusions. More than two decades of research has failed to reveal important differences in the adjustment or development of children or adolescents reared by same-sex couples compared to those reared by other-sex couples. Results of the research suggest that qualities of family relationships are more tightly linked with child outcomes than is parental sexual orientation.
The American Psychological Association says:
"there is no scientific evidence that parenting effectiveness is related to parental sexual orientation: lesbian and gay parents are as likely as heterosexual parents to provide supportive and healthy environments for their children (Patterson, 2000, 2004; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999);"
"research has shown that the adjustment, development, and psychological well-being of children is unrelated to parental sexual orientation and that the children of lesbian and gay parents are as likely as those of heterosexual parents to flourish (Patterson, 2004; Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001)"
"Many lesbians and gay men are parents. In the 2000 U. S. Census, 33% of female same-sex couple households and 22% of male same-sex couple households reported at least one child under the age of 18 living in the home. Despite the significant presence of at least 163,879 households headed by lesbian or gay parents in U.S. society, three major concerns about lesbian and gay parents are commonly voiced (Falk, 1994; Patterson, Fulcher & Wainright, 2002). These include concerns that lesbians and gay men are mentally ill, that lesbians are less maternal than heterosexual women, and that lesbians' and gay men's relationships with their sexual partners leave little time for their relationships with their children. In general, research has failed to provide a basis for any of these concerns (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). First, homosexuality is not a psychological disorder (Conger, 1975). Although exposure to prejudice and discrimination based on sexual orientation may cause acute distress (Mays & Cochran, 2001; Meyer, 2003), there is no reliable evidence that homosexual orientation per se impairs psychological functioning. Second, beliefs that lesbian and gay adults are not fit parents have no empirical foundation (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002). Lesbian and heterosexual women have not been found to differ markedly in their approaches to child rearing (Patterson, 2000; Tasker, 1999). Members of gay and lesbian couples with children have been found to divide the work involved in childcare evenly, and to be satisfied with their relationships with their partners (Patterson, 2000, 2004a). The results of some studies suggest that lesbian mothers' and gay fathers' parenting skills may be superior to those of matched heterosexual parents. There is no scientific basis for concluding that lesbian mothers or gay fathers are unfit parents on the basis of their sexual orientation (Armesto, 2002; Patterson, 2000; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). On the contrary, results of research suggest that lesbian and gay parents are as likely as heterosexual parents to provide supportive and healthy environments for their children."
and
"Results of social science research have failed to confirm any of these concerns about children of lesbian and gay parents (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Tasker, 1999). Research suggests that sexual identities (including gender identity, gender-role behavior, and sexual orientation) develop in much the same ways among children of lesbian mothers as they do among children of heterosexual parents (Patterson, 2004a). Studies of other aspects of personal development (including personality, self-concept, and conduct) similarly reveal few differences between children of lesbian mothers and children of heterosexual parents (Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001; Tasker, 1999). However, few data regarding these concerns are available for children of gay fathers (Patterson, 2004b). Evidence also suggests that children of lesbian and gay parents have normal social relationships with peers and adults (Patterson, 2000, 2004a; Perrin, 2002; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001; Tasker, 1999; Tasker & Golombok, 1997). The picture that emerges from research is one of general engagement in social life with peers, parents, family members, and friends. Fears about children of lesbian or gay parents being sexually abused by adults, ostracized by peers, or isolated in single-sex lesbian or gay communities have received no scientific support. Overall, results of research suggest that the development, adjustment, and well-being of children with lesbian and gay parents do not differ markedly from that of children with heterosexual parents"
There's a lot of stuff out there that find different conclusions. On the whole, however, those are not scientific articles published in scientific journals based on scientific research. They are opinions, church statements, political statements, journal articles pointing out all the flaws in articles that find no problem with gay parenting, etc etc etc. I'm gonna go with the scientific stuff. Do you know you can find seemingly-authoritative stuff on the web that argues smoking doesn't cause cancer? I'm not trying to argue the nuances of the word "cause" here, like many of these articles. Fact is, smoking puts you at a increasingly higher risk for developing cancer. (Random side note: one article I found argues that a 'paranormal wave' causes cancer. Not anything else. Like smoking or the sun or asbestos. Good one, crazy man, why dont you pass that along to my grandparents?) The point that I'm making is that there's a lot of crap out there regarding smoking and cancer, and that I'm going to rely on the data and opinions of the many research hospitals and universities, medical professionals, and medical organizations like WHO and CDC. Not crazy meta physicists and people paid by the tobacco industry. Same idea with this homosexual parenting stuff - I feel pretty confident in the official positions American Psychological Association and American Medical Association. The end :)
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Barf
Here's how lunch went today:
11:30 - Stomach rumbles. Feel slightly guilty about being hungry because, seriously, only ate breakfast 2 hours ago.
11:33 - Devour a yogurt. Feel happy that it is a Lite Yogurt. Also, thank higher power for Ralph's.
12:02 - Hungry. Again. Honestly, stomach?
12:03 - Forage in fridge. Thank higher power that you can't afford bad-for-you foods.
12:04 - Emerge victoriously with pint of blueberries! Thank higher power for Walmart and cheap produce.
12:09 - Realize you've absentmindedly ingested the entire pint of blueberries, which were of questionable expiration date, being a Walmart special and all. Feel slightly sick. Decide to take a nap on the couch. Thank higher power for unemployment (but pray for a job soon), and also for free housing.
In related news, I'm kinda loving my life right now.
11:30 - Stomach rumbles. Feel slightly guilty about being hungry because, seriously, only ate breakfast 2 hours ago.
11:33 - Devour a yogurt. Feel happy that it is a Lite Yogurt. Also, thank higher power for Ralph's.
12:02 - Hungry. Again. Honestly, stomach?
12:03 - Forage in fridge. Thank higher power that you can't afford bad-for-you foods.
12:04 - Emerge victoriously with pint of blueberries! Thank higher power for Walmart and cheap produce.
12:09 - Realize you've absentmindedly ingested the entire pint of blueberries, which were of questionable expiration date, being a Walmart special and all. Feel slightly sick. Decide to take a nap on the couch. Thank higher power for unemployment (but pray for a job soon), and also for free housing.
In related news, I'm kinda loving my life right now.
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