Before I packed up and moved to NY, I had the most fantastic job ever. I worked as a MA in a doctors office, just like I do now, but my office was the best. It was small - 2 doctors and 1 PA - and all 3 of the providers were absolutely committed to teaching. Which was perfect for me and my future hopes and dreams. I could spend 20 minutes asking Dr Whitely questions and she wouldn't just humor me - she'd enjoy it. I miss that job.
The office manager has a 16 year old daughter who plays soccer. In fact, at my interview we spent 30 minutes talking soccer - coaches, teams, etc - and I'm halfway convinced that's why I was hired in the first place.
As we all know, that wonderful change of life can hit right around 16. For this girl, she was right in the middle of it. For an athlete, that can mean a lot of different things. For soccer players, it means soccer thighs. For me it all started around 16 - I think its awful that kids start weight training right in the middle of puberty. First I've got tiny bumps on my chest and now you want me to squat 100lbs? Everything on your body is going in every which way: boobs out, hips out, abs in, and it can be a bit overwhelming. Trust me.
One of the not-so-pleasant side effects of weight training is stretch marks. For me and my fellow soccer players, this devastates your upper thighs, right around the hips. I have some nasty scarring all over the front half of me - though, for the record, as my legs are shrinking so are my scars! YAY!
Back to my office manager and her daughter. The OM was really concerned about her daughter. To the point that one day she called me back into her office to ask me about it. I assured her that some stretch marks on the thighs were totally normal, not to worry, and I had lots. I even went so far as to tell her that I would show her mine, if she wanted to see. And although I was joking, she asked if she could. So, what did I do?
I closed the door and dropped my pants. In front of my boss.
How many people have pulled this off without getting fired? I'm sure that I'm in the minority here. In the end, though, I made this poor woman feel a little bit better about her daughter and given that outcome, I'm totally at peace with my shamelessness.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
In Which I Talk About Food
My favorite topic? Yes.
Growing up, I never worried about how much I ate or what I put in my mouth. First, I was young and had the metabolism of a teenager - oh how I miss those days. Second, I was an athlete, and a serious one. I played enough soccer to burn off anything I consumed, and then some. One week in the summer I decided to estimate my caloric intake: around 6000. A day. And I was losing weight. At that rate, who cares what you eat?
As I grew up, and as my soccer playing days came to an end, I still never thought about food. I just ate it, the same way I always had. As you can imagine, this led to some weight gain. I didn't think it was a big deal - only natural, right, that when you stop doing heavy exercise for 3 hours a day that you put on a few pounds. I was still slim, and healthy.
At some point I grew unhappy with myself, my body, my weight. It was never the number on the scale, no, the athlete in me learned how to ignore that number long ago. It was just the way I felt. My arms had a slight jiggle. My belly button - an inny - sorta disappeared. My legs, which had always been big, lost their definition and rock-solidness. I grew my first real set of boobs. I wasn't my athletic, trim self and I didn't like it. Enough was enough, I was fixing this situation.
I thought about a lot of options. Did some research online. Realized a 'diet' was not going to work for me. My attitudes about food and exercise had to change permanently, not just for a 6-week lo-carb phase. I started thinking about the things I was putting into my body, and what I was asking that body to do. I started cooking more, and the things I cooked were full of veggies, complex carbs, and proteins. I started watching how much sugar I brought in, and started choosing unrefined grains and breads. I made swaps - frozen yogurt for ice cream, fruit for cookies, chicken and turkey for red meats.
I'm happy to report that I've lost a solid 17 pounds just by making these small changes. The best part? While at first I felt like I was making sacrifices (like when I really, really wanted that ice cream) now I feel good about my choices. I enjoy eating what I eat, and don't feel like I'm giving anything up. If given the choice, I'd probably choose a turkey burger over a hamburger. I'd take frozen yogurt over ice cream (ok... well, maybe) and I'd definitely pick fruits or veggies for a snack over chips, candy, or anything else. Why? Because last week I wore a pair of pants that I haven't fit into since fall semester of my freshman year of college, which was the leanest I've probably ever been. Because I'm over half way to my goal (which is, incidentally, my weight fall semester of freshman year). And mostly because I feel better about the way I look and feel. And that's a beautiful thing.
Growing up, I never worried about how much I ate or what I put in my mouth. First, I was young and had the metabolism of a teenager - oh how I miss those days. Second, I was an athlete, and a serious one. I played enough soccer to burn off anything I consumed, and then some. One week in the summer I decided to estimate my caloric intake: around 6000. A day. And I was losing weight. At that rate, who cares what you eat?
As I grew up, and as my soccer playing days came to an end, I still never thought about food. I just ate it, the same way I always had. As you can imagine, this led to some weight gain. I didn't think it was a big deal - only natural, right, that when you stop doing heavy exercise for 3 hours a day that you put on a few pounds. I was still slim, and healthy.
At some point I grew unhappy with myself, my body, my weight. It was never the number on the scale, no, the athlete in me learned how to ignore that number long ago. It was just the way I felt. My arms had a slight jiggle. My belly button - an inny - sorta disappeared. My legs, which had always been big, lost their definition and rock-solidness. I grew my first real set of boobs. I wasn't my athletic, trim self and I didn't like it. Enough was enough, I was fixing this situation.
I thought about a lot of options. Did some research online. Realized a 'diet' was not going to work for me. My attitudes about food and exercise had to change permanently, not just for a 6-week lo-carb phase. I started thinking about the things I was putting into my body, and what I was asking that body to do. I started cooking more, and the things I cooked were full of veggies, complex carbs, and proteins. I started watching how much sugar I brought in, and started choosing unrefined grains and breads. I made swaps - frozen yogurt for ice cream, fruit for cookies, chicken and turkey for red meats.
I'm happy to report that I've lost a solid 17 pounds just by making these small changes. The best part? While at first I felt like I was making sacrifices (like when I really, really wanted that ice cream) now I feel good about my choices. I enjoy eating what I eat, and don't feel like I'm giving anything up. If given the choice, I'd probably choose a turkey burger over a hamburger. I'd take frozen yogurt over ice cream (ok... well, maybe) and I'd definitely pick fruits or veggies for a snack over chips, candy, or anything else. Why? Because last week I wore a pair of pants that I haven't fit into since fall semester of my freshman year of college, which was the leanest I've probably ever been. Because I'm over half way to my goal (which is, incidentally, my weight fall semester of freshman year). And mostly because I feel better about the way I look and feel. And that's a beautiful thing.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Weekend Update
I'm terrible at this blogging thing. I'm sporadic, mostly incoherent, and I ramble. But the worst offense of all - I take no pictures.
This weekend, for example, I went to Boston. My favorite place in the whole wide world. Well, its certainly up there. And I took exactly 0 pictures. I suck. But I would like you all to know that I had a fabulous time and I want to live there instead of NY. I had a really hard time coming home. Boston is much more... relaxed... than here. And much less expensive! All in all, Boston > NY.
This is going to be random. I warned you.
Taco turns 21 this week. I'm bummed I can't be there to get her good and drunkfaced, but I'm sure she will do just fine on her own. Happy 21st, seester!
Just over a month until I make my triumphant return to AZ. Hey, I'm excited. I miss AZ, probably a little more than I expected. Mostly I miss the people though.
Today I made a mental list of all my faults. Let me say, I'm a little concerned - it was a long list. However, I'm more concerned by the fact that I was in a better mood after I made the list than I was before - the list cheered me up? I'm hoping its just because I realized that, for the most part, I am totally capable of fixing these faults - always good news. Now, the question is, will I...
Boyfriends shouldn't go grocery shopping on their own. He did this weekend and came back with $7 worth of yogurt (which, at $.30 each, is a lot) and rice cakes and not much else. Oh, how could I forget the two containers of frozen yogurt? Ha - no vegetables, no fruit, nothing to EAT! Ah! Its a good thing I like him.
I have ANOTHER 2 days off this week... fabulous. They are days 4 and 5 of my 7 days off this month. I'm considering making this my weekly work schedule - 2 days off in the middle of the week. 30 hours a week. The good thing is, I don't get paid nearly enough so that extra 10 hours doesn't really make a difference :)
I'm going to forage for more food now. Then take a glorious nap. If I didn't hate my job so much, I'd love it.
This weekend, for example, I went to Boston. My favorite place in the whole wide world. Well, its certainly up there. And I took exactly 0 pictures. I suck. But I would like you all to know that I had a fabulous time and I want to live there instead of NY. I had a really hard time coming home. Boston is much more... relaxed... than here. And much less expensive! All in all, Boston > NY.
This is going to be random. I warned you.
Taco turns 21 this week. I'm bummed I can't be there to get her good and drunkfaced, but I'm sure she will do just fine on her own. Happy 21st, seester!
Just over a month until I make my triumphant return to AZ. Hey, I'm excited. I miss AZ, probably a little more than I expected. Mostly I miss the people though.
Today I made a mental list of all my faults. Let me say, I'm a little concerned - it was a long list. However, I'm more concerned by the fact that I was in a better mood after I made the list than I was before - the list cheered me up? I'm hoping its just because I realized that, for the most part, I am totally capable of fixing these faults - always good news. Now, the question is, will I...
Boyfriends shouldn't go grocery shopping on their own. He did this weekend and came back with $7 worth of yogurt (which, at $.30 each, is a lot) and rice cakes and not much else. Oh, how could I forget the two containers of frozen yogurt? Ha - no vegetables, no fruit, nothing to EAT! Ah! Its a good thing I like him.
I have ANOTHER 2 days off this week... fabulous. They are days 4 and 5 of my 7 days off this month. I'm considering making this my weekly work schedule - 2 days off in the middle of the week. 30 hours a week. The good thing is, I don't get paid nearly enough so that extra 10 hours doesn't really make a difference :)
I'm going to forage for more food now. Then take a glorious nap. If I didn't hate my job so much, I'd love it.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
The Zoo!!!
Last Saturday D and I headed up to the Bronx Zoo. We both bank with BofA, and they have this cool promotion the first weekend of every month - free admission at certain cultural or academic institutions if you show your BofA card! A few months ago we spent a Saturday at the Met - which was incredible - and this month we figured this would be the last month we could actually stand to be outside, so it was a zoo kind of day.
Unlike the Phoenix Zoo, the Bronx Zoo is huge. Oh, and you can actually see the animals. And now, so will you!
The tiger! I'm going to admit, there was one point while we were standing here that the tiger got right next to the glass right in front of us. I swear he stood there and stared at us! I didn't get a picture because I got really excited and ended up snapping a picture of the ground instead. And by the time my camera reset, he had walked away. I'm a failure.
Poor quality picture - but this was the cutest little monkey we saw all day!
The sea lions were by far the best part of the day. There was a huge tank will 5 or 6 of them in there, and they were all swimming around and doing tricks to show off. 
Then, this guy jumped right up on the edge of the tank right in front of us. He was just looking around at everybody and literally posing for pictures.
Then he let out a roar - I don't know what sound sea lions really make? - and splashed right back into the tank!
This was in the Madagascar exhibit. I don't remember what these guys were, exactly, but they were neat!
How cute are these guys all huddled up with each other?
I like to move it move it!
The giraffes! There were four, including a baby, which was the most adorable thing I've ever seen. Unfortunately, I couldn't get a picture.
African dogs - very strange. They looked like dogs, only bigger and scarier. I did not want to pet these guys.
The bear! He was for some reason very intent on digging himself a hole.
When he finished digging, he sat right down and took a nap.
This was the showdown of the century. I don't know about you, but I don't think I'd let my 2 year old face off against a bird the same size as her.
Yeah, these guys weren't far from the lions. Like, I'm pretty sure the lions had access to them, if you know what I mean.
Unlike the Phoenix Zoo, the Bronx Zoo is huge. Oh, and you can actually see the animals. And now, so will you!
The tiger! I'm going to admit, there was one point while we were standing here that the tiger got right next to the glass right in front of us. I swear he stood there and stared at us! I didn't get a picture because I got really excited and ended up snapping a picture of the ground instead. And by the time my camera reset, he had walked away. I'm a failure.
Poor quality picture - but this was the cutest little monkey we saw all day!
The sea lions were by far the best part of the day. There was a huge tank will 5 or 6 of them in there, and they were all swimming around and doing tricks to show off.
There was a little baby sea lion too, and he was wiped out! He didn't really move from this position much for the whole time we stood there. Its rough to be a baby :)
Every once in a while one would propel itself out of the water and land with a big splash. Bunch of show offs, I tell ya.
Then, this guy jumped right up on the edge of the tank right in front of us. He was just looking around at everybody and literally posing for pictures.
Then he let out a roar - I don't know what sound sea lions really make? - and splashed right back into the tank!
This was in the Madagascar exhibit. I don't remember what these guys were, exactly, but they were neat!
How cute are these guys all huddled up with each other?
I like to move it move it!
The giraffes! There were four, including a baby, which was the most adorable thing I've ever seen. Unfortunately, I couldn't get a picture.
African dogs - very strange. They looked like dogs, only bigger and scarier. I did not want to pet these guys.
The bear! He was for some reason very intent on digging himself a hole.
When he finished digging, he sat right down and took a nap.
This was the showdown of the century. I don't know about you, but I don't think I'd let my 2 year old face off against a bird the same size as her.
The lions!
Yeah, these guys weren't far from the lions. Like, I'm pretty sure the lions had access to them, if you know what I mean.
And that was our big day at the zoo. It was a freakin hike to get out there - the Bronx is NOT close to Brooklyn - and also, I don't think I'd go to the Bronx at night. But the zoo was neat. And the pretzels were cheap :) Thank you, BofA, for another cheap day!
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Apples and Oranges
As fall has officially arrived here on the East coast, we've entered my favorite time of the produce year: Apple Season! I love apples. Love them. I could eat 3 apples a day, I kid you not. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, I want apples in all of my meals. It's ridiculous to begin with, and sometimes gets completely out of hand.
With all this nonsense about apples, I want to finally admit to the world: I am an apple snob. I like all types of apples, don't get me wrong, but I will flat out refuse a Red Delicious, and don't get me started on Goldens... yuk. I like Granny Smith enough to buy them, but in my heart there is only place for one perfect kind of apple: the McIntosh. It is the very apex of apple perfection: tart yet sweet. Crunchy, but not too much. A pretty combination of red and green. And I think it is delicious.
A lot of people look down on the McIntosh. It's not good for baking, they say, because it loses too much moisture or it falls too much. Bah! Humbug. That's totally bogus. How could you say anything bad about the apple that inspired the Apple brand, the Macintosh computer? I want you to go to the store and pick up at least 3 pounds of McIntosh apples. They're good for you. They're delicious in pies. Or apple butter, or cider, or bread, or cake, or however else you want to eat them. Just eat them, and rejoice in there delicious, tarty, juicy goodness. You are welcome.
With all this nonsense about apples, I want to finally admit to the world: I am an apple snob. I like all types of apples, don't get me wrong, but I will flat out refuse a Red Delicious, and don't get me started on Goldens... yuk. I like Granny Smith enough to buy them, but in my heart there is only place for one perfect kind of apple: the McIntosh. It is the very apex of apple perfection: tart yet sweet. Crunchy, but not too much. A pretty combination of red and green. And I think it is delicious.
A lot of people look down on the McIntosh. It's not good for baking, they say, because it loses too much moisture or it falls too much. Bah! Humbug. That's totally bogus. How could you say anything bad about the apple that inspired the Apple brand, the Macintosh computer? I want you to go to the store and pick up at least 3 pounds of McIntosh apples. They're good for you. They're delicious in pies. Or apple butter, or cider, or bread, or cake, or however else you want to eat them. Just eat them, and rejoice in there delicious, tarty, juicy goodness. You are welcome.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
It's a Simon and Garfunkel kind of Night
Kathy’s Song
I hear the drizzle of the rain
Like a memory it falls
Soft and warm continuing
Tapping on my roof and walls.
And from the shelter of my mind
Through the window of my eyes
I gaze beyond the rain-drenched streets
To England where my heart lies.
My mind's distracted and diffused
My thoughts are many miles away
They lie with you when you're asleep
And kiss you when you start your day.
And as a song I was writing is left undone
I don't know why I spend my time
Writing songs I can't believe
With words that tear and strain to rhyme.
And so you see I have come to doubt
All that I once held as true
I stand alone without beliefs
The only truth I know is you.
And as I watch the drops of rain
Weave their weary paths and die
I know that I am like the rain
There but for the grace of you go I.
I’m a terrible person. But S&G takes me back. And in this case, back to the very same place I’ve been stuck.
I hate writing in abstracts. Hopefully I get myself sorted out soon.
I hear the drizzle of the rain
Like a memory it falls
Soft and warm continuing
Tapping on my roof and walls.
And from the shelter of my mind
Through the window of my eyes
I gaze beyond the rain-drenched streets
To England where my heart lies.
My mind's distracted and diffused
My thoughts are many miles away
They lie with you when you're asleep
And kiss you when you start your day.
And as a song I was writing is left undone
I don't know why I spend my time
Writing songs I can't believe
With words that tear and strain to rhyme.
And so you see I have come to doubt
All that I once held as true
I stand alone without beliefs
The only truth I know is you.
And as I watch the drops of rain
Weave their weary paths and die
I know that I am like the rain
There but for the grace of you go I.
I’m a terrible person. But S&G takes me back. And in this case, back to the very same place I’ve been stuck.
I hate writing in abstracts. Hopefully I get myself sorted out soon.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh
It's 1:30 in the afternoon and I just put on a bra. I love days off.
I'm going to be having a lot of days off this month, thanks to the plethora of Jewish holidays. My office is ultra-orthodox, so I have a total of 7 days off. Fantastic. The only bad part: I'm not getting paid for most of them. Ohhhhh well.
Speaking of which, I went to church yesterday. It was the first day of Rosh Hashana, or the Jewish new year, so I went with my lovely Jewish boyfriend and some of his family. I've never been to Jewish services before - only 1 Bar Mitzvah - but this was pretty neat. Minus the fact that I couldn't understand a thing that was going on, because most of the service was in Hebrew :) Another bonus: the service was actually held in Plymouth Church, which is a historic church in downtown Brooklyn. Absolutely beautiful. I'm such a sucker for old things.
The thing I like best about the Jews is that they like to eat. I cannot tell you how much I've eaten the last 2 days - we had a full thanksgiving-style dinner on Monday night with turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans and some Jewish additions like kugel and mandelbrot. Last night was chicken, a brisket, asparagus, honey cake, more kugel. Oh, and lots of matzah ball soup. And gefilte fish, which I did not sample. I've had enough food the last 2 days to last me all week. And it was delicious. Next week is Yom Kippur, so I'll have to do it all over again. Hello to the beginning of the holiday weight gain!
I've been working a LOT on my grad school applications. They are due the 1st of November, so its crunch time! I'm getting really nervous about getting in - It will be such a disappointment if I don't. But there's not much I can do about it at this point except hope for the best!! Good thoughts are appreciated.
Time to run to the grocery store - I'm making my dad's chili for dinner and I need to pick up a few things. Have a good day and Shana Tova! (Happy New Year!)
I'm going to be having a lot of days off this month, thanks to the plethora of Jewish holidays. My office is ultra-orthodox, so I have a total of 7 days off. Fantastic. The only bad part: I'm not getting paid for most of them. Ohhhhh well.
Speaking of which, I went to church yesterday. It was the first day of Rosh Hashana, or the Jewish new year, so I went with my lovely Jewish boyfriend and some of his family. I've never been to Jewish services before - only 1 Bar Mitzvah - but this was pretty neat. Minus the fact that I couldn't understand a thing that was going on, because most of the service was in Hebrew :) Another bonus: the service was actually held in Plymouth Church, which is a historic church in downtown Brooklyn. Absolutely beautiful. I'm such a sucker for old things.
The thing I like best about the Jews is that they like to eat. I cannot tell you how much I've eaten the last 2 days - we had a full thanksgiving-style dinner on Monday night with turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans and some Jewish additions like kugel and mandelbrot. Last night was chicken, a brisket, asparagus, honey cake, more kugel. Oh, and lots of matzah ball soup. And gefilte fish, which I did not sample. I've had enough food the last 2 days to last me all week. And it was delicious. Next week is Yom Kippur, so I'll have to do it all over again. Hello to the beginning of the holiday weight gain!
I've been working a LOT on my grad school applications. They are due the 1st of November, so its crunch time! I'm getting really nervous about getting in - It will be such a disappointment if I don't. But there's not much I can do about it at this point except hope for the best!! Good thoughts are appreciated.
Time to run to the grocery store - I'm making my dad's chili for dinner and I need to pick up a few things. Have a good day and Shana Tova! (Happy New Year!)
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